And just like that it's gone...
Subscription ended.
The effect is that I am now no longer even remotely curious about whether subscription is worth while... take that as you will.

It leaves me wondering though, about how easily things end. Life ends. This is an absolute. I, myself and everyone I know and care about will die and be buried or burnt. My little brothers and sisters will all end up bone and ash. That girl I smiled at in the street could meet a grisly end tomorrow morning. I myself may never wake up, or write another journal entry again.

Morbid? Well, yes... but important none the less.
A constant understanding of the fragile nature of existance brings with it a certain perspective that I find invaluable. It also begs the question, why wait?
Why wait until your on your death bed, taking your final breath to realise that money, power, sex, politics, hate, and violence are all illusionary. Death doesn't discriminate. Death doesn't only come to the poor.
So what's really important?

For me, I guess the answer to that question is that children and love are important. I'd like to say parties and a wild ride, but it just isn't true.
If I die without that moment when you look into a little babies eyes and think, "I made you, you are part of me, we are really, truly the same."
If I die without having experienced that, then I know I will die with regret.

The rest is just meaningless bullshit. I put up with it only because I don't have the time or energy to fight against the never ending triviality that is our current idea of society. Besides, what would be the point of such a fight...

We're only going to die anyhow.

I love you all
A